Here to Serve!

From behind my eyes, the world seems fairly simple in many ways. From this point of view I’m just like anyone else; from my view I’ve got the same problems and challenges, and I have the same hopes and dreams.  When I go home alone, I’m looking at all of the same issues as everyone else, including what bills have come in the mail, what laundry has to be done, and, of course, “What’s for dinner, Mom?”

Well, it seems like my world is the same, but is it?  After giving it further thought, I guess not, and I should probably never get confused about this.  Why? Because I have spent the bulk of my life on this spiritual journey of personal transformation and consciousness.  I have spent years in classes, trainings, workshops, and deep spiritual practice to free myself from the human elements of lack, fear, and doubt. I have forgiven everyone who ever harmed me in any way, including myself, and have made peace with those whom I have harmed. I have reaped the harvest of these years that I invested and have found freedom and a resource inside of me that I didn’t even know existed. Back to this later….

Every once in a while, I will be called to be in service in a moment when I least expect it—when I’m not ready, or distracted, or quite frankly when I’m not in the mood.  Yes, I said it out loud: everyone once in a while I am not in the mood or do not want to be asked for anything. Sometimes it’s because I’m busy, but there are definitely times when my own needs are distracting me and being available to give or serve just isn’t my first concern.  

Technically, I suppose this is okay. I suppose that I have a right to be unavailable or at the very least not want to be available.  This seems reasonable; after all I’m human, aren’t I?  Well, human yes, but do I really have a “right” to be unavailable?  No, not really? It took a while, but I have come to this after much contemplation.  Healthy boundaries are good for everyone—this is so true—but I choose my path. I took on the cloak of ministry not as a yoke about my neck to weigh me down, but as a lift to fly from.  When I stood to have that stole placed around my neck at my ordination, it was a sort of silent, sacred covenant that silently says to those whom I serve: I am here for you; I am here to listen to you; I am here to serve. And for that rare occasion when I am asked to be in service when I don’t really want to be, I will have to just get over it, pray more, process in a healthy way, and be present. 

To those of you who have promised to lift, love, and serve, isn’t this what we signed up for? Aren’t we here for others?  Here’s to the call to service.